I failed a test today. Granted it was my vehicle inspection (and not a pregnancy test)....but still, there's something very demoralizing about waiting 20 minutes for your car to pass through a line controlled by two people who are about as pleasant as Kansas City Royals fans in mid-August and then having a red sticker thrown on due to a burnt out brake bulb.

Kansas City Royal fan.....isn't that an oxymoron?



But anyway...I had to head back to the shop to get it fixed and then drive back to the DMV or MVC or PMS....or whatever they call it now to wait 20 minutes once again for them to look at a bulb. They seemed to look at EVERYTHING again before they passed me. Like I am going to remove my catalytic converter and install pimped out tint and all kinds of illegal devices on my car in the 90 minutes since I left the inspection center. Give me the sticker and let me go waste more gas.

My new hobby....collecting codes from Coke bottles as part of the My Coke Reward campaign. Yes, I officially have reached a new low point but if drinking 800 bottles of soda can help me snag that coveted "Coca Cola Judges Cup from the American Idol set" or an "Authentic Autographed Race Tire" , then my life goals will have been fulfilled.

Feel free to send me your codes. I'm currently up to 62 points. Only about 36,938 more for the top prize of "World Domination and free year's supply of Diet Coke."

To quote Derrick Coleman, "Whoop Dee Damn Doo."

I have a formal this weekend with E. It might involve me dancing at some point. I'm sure that won't be too embarassing for all parties involved. Especially with the genetics that I have. My grandfather used to say that his Naval officer used to tell him he walked "like a monkey fucking a football." I won't include a visual there.

Happy Mother's Day to my mom and all other moms out there. Stay away from wire hangers.